Logistics | January 01, 0001

The Official Unofficial Metal Gear Rising_ Revengeance Drinking Game™

I’m enjoying the totally absurd Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance (check out Evan’s review if you missed it) but like many games by both Platinum and Kojima, it’s hard not to notice certain tropes, clichés and themes. https://kotaku.com/metal-gear-rising-revengeance-the-kotaku-review-5985250 You know what that means? It’s time for a drinking game! The Rules to The Official Unofficial Metal Gear Rising Revengeance Drinking Game™ Combatants may choose their beverage of choice unless specified, but Sangria or another blood-colored, electrolyte-replenishing drink is preferred. Also, don’t be stupid: if you’re going rummy mars

to drink, do it responsibly. Whenever you remember that Revengeance is a real word… Take a sip Whenever someone smiles in a very creepy way… Smile, Take a swig Whenever Jetstream Sam looks bored, irate or generally condescending… Yawn, take a swig Whenever someone poses before rummy master

a swordfight… Take a swig dramatically Whenever you become a little embarrassed by the music (your milage will vary)… Take a swig and shout “Crawling in my skiiiiiiiin!” Whenever you are confused by a sudden tonal shift… Look nonplussed, shrug and take a swig Whenever you rummy master notice a Kojima-esque reference or easter egg… Take a swig, chuckle to yourself and say “Ho Ho, I see what you did there!” Whenever rummy modern there is a sudden snap-zoom on somebody’s face… Slam back a shot and open your eyes very suddenly with a sense of drama Whenever someone discusses moral relativism, the war economy,

the Imperialism of the First World or the brutality of man at length…. Furrow your brow, nod and gently sip a glass of fine wine or single malt whisky Whenever you are overcome with an odd sense of guilt, ennui and self-loathing at the enjoyment of your own violent actions… Drink until all those battlefield emotions are suppressed Bonus rule: Whenever you can’t resist the urge to say “It’s just a flesh wound”… Drink until you stop quoting Monty Python like a third grader Good luck guys! Disclaimer: Kotaku and its parent company are not responsible for any brain damage or self-hospitalization you may incur by playing “The Official Unoffical Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance Drinking Game”. But seriously, drink responsibly.

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The Official Unofficial Metal Gear Rising_ Revengeance Drinking Game™

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